The term ‘Dry Patch’ is most commonly associated with a lack of, erm, intimate relations with a member of the opposite sex (or same, depending on your preferences) for a sustained period of time. Most of us will have had one, maybe some of you are going through one right now. Christmas and New Year are over, few people are going out, and that lovely tradition of Dry January means that drunken hook-ups are few and far between.
Then there are the different kind of Dry Patches: work, creativity, and – what I’m currently experiencing – dating. My dating dry patch is the result of several factors:
- Christmas and New Year is a bad time to start having dates – lack of availability before December 25th (too many parties to go to) then it would seem most of London, myself included, high-tailed it off to the country for over a week. Hardly prime dating time
- Having been hitting the dating scene hard for the last few months, I’ve experienced something of a burn-out. Tiredness and a serious case of can’t-be-arsed have set in, and at the moment I’d rather spend time with friends and family than a guy who may or may not make me laugh and feel good about myself (whereas friends/family always do)
- With the aforementioned burn-out has come something of a knock to my confidence. Going on several dates with guys (not all at the same time obvs) then never hearing from them again hasn’t exactly left me feeling cocky about my own charms or powers of attraction
- Is it just me or has the standard of men out there suddenly taken a sharp dip? The various online sites I’ve been using used to be full of hotties; now I’m offered a screen full of Average Joes. Meh…
- One of my New Year’s resolutions is to not let affect my love life (or lack thereof) affect my overall emotional well-being, so what better way to achieve this than avoid men as much as possible?
- I genuinely enjoy being single. I can do what I want, when I want, and not have to consult with anyone about my plans
- Valentines Day is a month away, which means that starting to date anyone now would result in an awkward stand-off where no one wants to mention Feb 14th, ending in unavoidable disappointment (see here for more thoughts on V-Day). Am I tempted to get myself in this predicament? No thanks
So, why am I continuing to scroll through Tinder and check my online profiles? Because, I’ll admit, it’s rather addictive. And I’m still of the rather optimistic (misguided?) frame of mind that maybe, just maybe, someone will come along and change my mind on most, if not all, the above points. In the process of explaining my blog combined with my online dating antics, most people will ask me if I’m looking for The One. Short answer: no. But, I hasten to add, dating is fun! I love meeting new people, I’ve tried new dating activities (climbing date anyone?), I’ve been taken to some amazing restaurants and bars in the past 6 months or so (oh Mr Hedge Fund, why did you do a Houdini?), and whilst there have certainly been some horror stories, there have been some very decent dates to dilute them.
Long story short, if someone came along tomorrow and swept me off my feet I wouldn’t say ‘hold on there buddy, can you come back in about a month?’. But I’m actually rather enjoying my dry patch. I’m not checking my phone every five seconds, I can go for over a week without shaving my legs, I suddenly have a lot more time for other people (including myself), and this time in a month I won’t be disappointed when I don’t get a pretty red or pink envelope and a large bunch of flowers delivered to my desk.
So, who wants to come out and get rip-roaring drunk with me on V-day…?!