Fantasy vs reality

I few weeks ago I wrote about the fact that most guys I’ve encountered, and am probably likely to encounter, are somewhat deficient in the maturity stakes.  Whilst this may continue to be true, I can’t help but feel that part of this is due to the abundance of ‘real men’ shown on our television screens.

What normal guy can compete with the likes of Don Draper (Mad Men), Raylan Givens (Justified) or Stefan and Damon Salvatore (Vampire Diaries)?  They all have money or power or amazing good looks or the ability to protect you, or any combination of the above.  What’s not to love?  With men like this plastered all over prime-time TV, the average real-life male can only ever come in below par.

For those of you unfamiliar with Justified, let me explain.  At first glance, this may seem like a run-of-the-mill good guys vs bad guys show set in redneck country where at least three people die in each episode.  However, type Timothy Olyphant into Google and you’ll see where the attraction lies.  Here’s a fine gun-slingin’, perp-shootin’, cowboy hat-wearin’ specimen of a man, made all the more attractive by his soft southern accent and his ability to save a damsel in distress with nothing more than a piece of rope and a razor blade.  Sorry men of the real world, you don’t really stand a chance.

Don’t worry, I’m completely aware that these men are fictional characters, and I’m equally aware that for every fifty bad apples there might be one good egg.  Having become accustomed to these non-existent wonder-men from television, perhaps it’s time to be more realistic in our expectations of what the opposite sex are capable of.  It’s unfair on any boyfriend/husband/date/sex friend for us to expect them to instantly be some kind of alpha male, a la Don Draper, and perhaps we’d all be much happier if we accepted that, at the end of the day, we’re all just human.


P.S. After last month’s blog post, I was accused by more than one person of being a man hater.  I would like to state that this is far from the truth.  Nor am I an extreme feminist, as some people seem to think.  I merely seek to articulate and try to explain what I know many women feel or think, and perhaps give the occasional guy who reads this a small insight into the female psyche.



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